The night made me realized a lot of things… How time flies, how I change while growing-up, people who made me laugh and cry, why they’d do that… what I’m made of and who am I?
I am a human full of emotions and I really loved being one.
I grew up, watching most of the 90’s anime. Sometimes, I’d watched Disney but I am not a fan until I reached high school. Most of the 90’s anime I’ve watched, always had this set up where a heroine is saved by the hero. I really like the thought of a guy (it doesn’t matter if he is a prince or not) saving a girl. Maybe because I really love the idea of a guy saving you from everything. Yah, my perception about love is so shallow that I only see an image of a woman as a damsel in distress, need to be saved by a man.
When I have a problems in my academics most probably in Algebra, I always call my friend’s brother for help. Good thing he is always ready to give me a helping hand. I always dreamed of a guy saving me when I am in trouble. A guy who will stay by my side even though I screwed up. Who holds me because I am weak. Who will be my guide in everything. He will teach me how to cook, how to be strong. Because literally, I don’t know anything.
Until, I realized that God’s plan is beyond that.
He did not made me just so I can be saved by all those young man out there. He made me, and He already did saved me. I was not saved by an ordinary man, I am saved by a God who truly loves me. So, why do I need some guys to save me again? The next thing I’ve realized is, I don’t a need a prince to save me, I just need a me, to save me.
I am not weak, so no need to hold my hand. Don’t save me, God already did it. When I am in trouble, don’t bother yourself, I can manage. Even though I screwed up at times or most of the time, still I can pick up myself and plaster a smile, and you don’t have to cook for me, I know how to cook.
I am sitting in this bench right now. Remembering all those things I wish I’d knew earlier. All those blurry images, I can see it now clearly.